Spiritual Inspiration

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    DylanFree
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    Post  DylanFree Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:37 am

    :blush: Hey everybody-


      Hate to do this for a first post. Because I haven't introduced myself properly yet. But here it goes...


       I was born in Sept of 1979. I am a transitioning FTM. I am asexual. I sing and learn music very easily. I am going to be taking a course in computer animation. I am pagan but have a strong belief in angels {in addition to the other subtle matter spirits namely fairies, succubi, sileni, mermaids etc}. I communicate with spirits...and I have mild cerebral palsy...


       I am close to some of my family members. Including my older half-brothers Chris, John, Sam and Richard and their mother Maryellen. My cousins Elic and Marc and aunt Janice {Elic and Marc's mother} and my aunt Anne. But one of the few people in my family that I am not close with is my older sister Fleur {btw my sister and I are actually a year and a day apart}. It's not even that we aren't close that brought this on. But I have always had this feeling...a feeling that I can't explain but is basically this. Even though we have the same parents I have always had this sense that Fleur and I weren't supposed to be related and that I {literally} was born from the wrong womb if that makes any real sense whatsoever. And for those family members that I am actually close too I treat them more as friends than bloodline relatives. The situation with Fleur is such that whenever someone has said "but Fleur is your sister" I always responded with "no she isn't". And fyi this is minus any strong feelings toward Fleur. I don't have any feelings of love or hatred toward Fleur. I've always been uncomfortable around her. But only because I always sensed that there was no connection. Much like living with a stranger who is your sibling on paper. Basically it feels as if I was literally born into the wrong family or even born to the wrong set of parents. And I don't know where this comes from...


       Another thing that is kind of inexplicable. I have a morbid phobia of firearms despite the fact that I have never been shot either deliberately or accidentally. I have never witnessed a shooting fatal or otherwise. And the only person in my family who owned firearms is my cousin Marc. So I'm not sure where this came from... 


       Something else that may have an impact. I love classic rock from the 1960s and even some from the 70s {possibly not that unusual} and recently I started scripts for two animated film projects having to do with rock groups from that time. One {called "The Wandering Musician"} is about Jim Morrison and the Doors and takes place between 1965 and 1968. The other film project {called "Friends"} has to do with Led Zeppelin and takes place between 1969 and 1970. Recently I was reading part of "The Wandering Musician" to an acquaintance and her reaction was "you've got it" {even though my research materials consist of Jim Morrison's poetry and Doors lyrics, photographs, concert footage and interviews, and btw ditto for "Friends"}. I'm not sure why this is. Because I was born eight years after Jim Morrison's death. I have actually had visions surrounding Jim Morrison. And my impressions of what was going on are different from what most people think. I don't know if I am having past-life regression visions or if I just tapped into something. Or if it's nothing other than creativity. Another thing. My friend gave me the same response with "Friends". And there again. I got a different feeling around them than most people my age who have heard them. I like Led Zeppelin's music. And I was a year old when John Bonham died. But I'm not sure if I have tapped into something here or it's the imagination at work...


       There is also something else that is sort of peculiar. In addition to an interest in the 1960s I also am fascinated by medieval lore and history and medieval weaponry. So much so that growing up some of my classmates {particularly in fifth grade} must have thought that I was extremely odd...


        Maybe this is nothing but complete nonsense. In any case I am wondering if anyone has insight on this for me. 


    Get back to me on this!
    Thanks!!
    Dylan :blush:
    Blueanchor
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    Post  Blueanchor Fri Mar 31, 2017 7:07 pm

    People have beliefs about this kind of thing, but why would anyone else have your insight for you, when in your heart you have your own?  

    I don't feel at home in today's society.  and have had past life memories that sometimes have explained some relationships for me. I feel that this is what you believe is happening in your own experience?
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    DylanFree
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    Post  DylanFree Mon Apr 03, 2017 5:15 am

    :sleepy3: Hey there-


      Blueanchor, answering your question...I'm not sure if that's what's going on. I actually feel at home with most of modern society. Except that I have a phobia around firearms that I can't explain. Because my feelings aren't grounded in political beliefs such as gun control vs the second amendment etc etc. Nor have I ever been a witness to gun violence. And then there's Fleur {bio sister}. Still trying to figure out why the connection isn't there. Because I've never felt a connection with her. 


    Any thoughts??
    Get back to me on this please,
    Thanks!!
    Dylan :sleepy3:
    Blueanchor
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    Post  Blueanchor Tue Apr 04, 2017 6:36 am

    Why is it that you want to find out why there's no connection to your sister? What are you hoping to find?
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    DylanFree
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    Post  DylanFree Tue Apr 11, 2017 4:54 am

    Blueanchor wrote:Why is it that you want to find out why there's no connection to your sister? What are you hoping to find?
    :sleepy3: : Hey there-

      Not sure what I'm hoping to find. Other than an explanation of why possibly. But there might not be an explanation. But there is a cousin that I am kind of close to and eventually I might tell him eventually. The thing is that I kind of always knew this. It's basically "what do I tell him".

    Thanks!!
    Get back to me,
    Dylan :sleepy3:

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